Paris "Io and my dream"

Alright I just just wrote a freak'in novel about Nepal, so I'll keep it short. Ahh so much to say, but I'll write more later, I just want to share one experience.

The night of June 19th: I went to a bar called The Pop-in. It is a very cool place, its owned by one of Devendra Banharts band mates, a groovy atmosphere and good music. I met a woman called Io, she is from New York and is traveling for a month around Europe. I'm choosing to share this experience because it had a strong impact on me and is on my mind today. When Io was 18 she was alone in the world, she had lived in Germany through out High School and is from New York city. She was in a place where she felt as though she did not belong any where and was also physically wandering the world alone. Io is a writer and a photographer and she is writing a novel now and is trying to recapture those feeling, the vulnerability that she felt at 18. Before I spoke to Io, I stared at her. I was being weird, but I felt very attracted to her. Maybe it was that was also American, but also something in her presence. We started to talk and she told me where she was traveling and I started to tell her about my journey. She was very interested as I happen to in such a similar place to the one that she is trying recall. She made me feel more aware of myself in this place. I've been growing and healing from wounds of the past, but I have focused on looking outward, into the world. She gave the advice to look inward and preserve my memory of this point in myself, and then told me that she was having a similar conversation with friend, whose living Colorado, and they both wished she would have done so. I told that was from Colorado and she was so surprised. It was like I needed to meet her at this exact point in my life and she needed the same. I think that reflection will actually help to experience and see more. Today I feel wide open. I have pain, fear, love, electricity all running through my body. I am awake and I am present. Io made me realize being a young woman, like she was and I am, alone in the world, its rare, this state of consciousness will change. Which is beautiful, but I must be present and I should do my best to preserve the memory of this place. We talked about where she is now, the future for me; she loves her life, but is not affected the same way by her experiences. Even if continue to travel and live loudly, I will never be as soft and vulnerable as I am today. Io and my connection actually got more weird, I started to tell her about the dream that I had, which was very very intense for me and put my into some pretty intense contemplation about where I am. In my dream I was on the metro and there was this insane accident, then somehow madness broke loose and six people had to survive while the rest needed to be killed off. So everyone was trying to kill each other and I was making my way through one train doing my best to survive and it so vivid, but under the ground it was a bit like India, there was one cart with a woman drinking milk (in India milk comes in bags) she was so creepy, she was like a cat and I had to kill her. Then the milk and blood mixed on the floor and bags of milk were scattered every where. This was the most intense and vivid part of my dream, the image of blood and milk mixing, and the first part I mentioned to Io. Then I snuck into and empty cart and rested for a minute, after I had been on this physically and emotionally intense killing spree, some stranger found me and told me that I was one of the six survivors. Next thing I new I was above ground again and the world was surprisingly very much the same as before this incident, but I was on my way to this office. The six survivors were now in business together as some sort of assassin. My friend Franky and my friend Travis were in the dream and were two of the survivors. I was still in shock about the path of my new life and my recent history. Travis was explaining to me that in life we choose our paths, and we have to create our existence by what we are given and that our strength had brought us to this point. I had a choice to die or survive, knowing that I would would be changed forever. He, like me chose to live and face the madness everyday. Travis was being so blunt about the fact that I was a straight killer and Franky was trying to calm me down saying this is the path that I am on and now, I had no choice. I now must except it and find peace in my new life of madness. They both offered different idea's of how I had gotten to where I was, is it my choice or are we affected by the universe and can only choose the way that we are changed/react. Io told me that when she was 18 she wrote a play write called "Mothers Milk", and themes were based around that image of blood and milk. I don't know why I told her about the dream, it was not so much about preservation and acceptance of a piece of time, but how how one comes to their present place. At ant rate it made our connection feel more intense and is making look for the connections now. I may never see Io again, but I am grateful to have met her and have started this movement into new thought and awareness.